Queen Camilla’s complicated relationship with Prince Harry — from ‘wicked stepmother’ jibe to playing a key role in royal reconciliation

For years, Prince Harry’s relationship with Queen Camilla has been marked by painful accusations, public criticism and deep family tensions. But as the Duke and Duchess of Sussex prepare to return to the UK after six years in California, Camilla is now believed to have played an important role in rebuilding Harry’s relationship with his father, King Charles.

Harry and Meghan are expected to return to Britain within weeks and remain there for an extended, potentially indefinite period. Although their future home has not been confirmed, their children, Archie, 7, and Lilibet, 5, are believed to have been enrolled in UK schools ahead of the new school year in September.

The move marks a significant development in Harry’s relationship with the Royal Family — particularly after years of tension between the Duke and his stepmother.

From the damaging claims contained in Harry’s 2023 memoir Spare to the family’s private reunion at Highgrove in July, the relationship between Harry and Camilla has undergone a complicated journey.

Harry’s harsh words about Camilla in Spare

Harry’s most public criticism of Camilla came in his memoir Spare, published in 2023.

The Duke described his stepmother as his “wicked stepmother” and also labelled her “dangerous” and a “villain”.

Reflecting on Charles’ marriage to Camilla, Harry wrote that he had complicated feelings about gaining a step-parent whom he believed had sacrificed him for her own public image. He also suggested that he hoped Camilla would be happy because he believed she might be “less dangerous” if she was.

The memoir also revealed the extent of Harry and Prince William’s opposition to their father marrying Camilla.

Harry claimed that he and William had asked Charles not to marry “the other woman”. According to Harry, the brothers were willing to welcome Camilla into the family, but only on the condition that their father did not marry her.

The revelations added another layer to an already difficult relationship between Harry and the woman who eventually became Queen.

Claims that Camilla believed Harry had been ‘brainwashed’

The tension resurfaced in another royal book this year.

In Betrayal: Power, Deceit and the Fight for the Future of the Royal Family, author Tom Bower alleged that Camilla had told a friend that Meghan had “brainwashed” Harry.

Bower claimed the Queen made the remark after Harry and Meghan’s relationship with other members of the Royal Family had deteriorated, including amid concerns reportedly raised by Prince William and Catherine, Princess of Wales.

The author also portrayed Meghan as a divisive figure within the Royal Family.

However, the Sussexes’ spokesperson strongly rejected the claims following the book’s release in March, telling People that Bower’s commentary had gone beyond criticism and become a fixation.

Camilla was reportedly hurt by Harry’s accusations

Despite the strength of Harry’s criticism, Camilla was not known to have responded publicly with a similar level of hostility.

As accusations against members of the Royal Family emerged following the publication of Spare, Camilla was reportedly hurt by Harry’s comments.

The Marchioness of Lansdowne, one of the Queen’s close friends and supporters and the godmother of Camilla’s daughter Laura Lopes, previously told the Sunday Times that the Queen had been dismayed by Harry’s remarks.

However, she suggested Camilla’s reaction was relatively restrained.

Rather than responding with anger, the Queen was said to have taken the view that the controversy would eventually settle if it was not continually given attention.

That approach appears to have remained consistent with Camilla’s handling of the long-running tensions surrounding the Sussexes.

The significance of the Highgrove reunion

A major moment came when Harry, Meghan and their two children travelled to Highgrove for a private meeting with King Charles and Queen Camilla.

No photographs or detailed account of the gathering were released. It was nevertheless believed to have been the first time Harry had seen Camilla since Charles’ Coronation in early 2023.

The meeting was particularly significant because it also marked the first time Charles had seen Archie and Lilibet since 2022.

Royal biographer Robert Jobson described Camilla’s presence at the meeting as “very significant”.

Speaking on the Sun’s Royal Exclusive podcast, Jobson pointed out that while Harry had been highly critical of Camilla, he had not directed the same level of criticism at his father.

He suggested that Camilla’s presence meant she could support Charles while also witnessing what was said during the meeting.

The encounter therefore represented more than a simple family reunion. It was also a moment in which the King and Queen were together as Harry attempted to rebuild his relationship with his father.

Camilla has spoken warmly about being a grandmother

The Highgrove meeting also carried particular significance for Camilla because of the importance she has placed on her role as a grandmother.

In a 2022 BBC interview, Camilla described being a grandmother as “the best thing in the world”.

She said grandchildren can teach their grandparents things while also learning from them in return.

Camilla has five grandchildren and five step-grandchildren. Her son Tom Parker Bowles has two children, Lola and Freddy, while her daughter Laura Lopes has three children, Eliza, Louis and Gus.

Through her marriage to King Charles, she is also step-grandmother to Prince George, Princess Charlotte, Prince Louis, Archie and Lilibet.

The Queen has previously spoken about enjoying the opportunity to spoil her grandchildren from time to time.

Speaking to British Vogue in 2022, she said one of the pleasures of being a grandmother was being able to give grandchildren some of the things their parents might normally forbid them from having.

Sara Parker-Bowles, the mother of Lola and Freddy, has also praised Camilla’s relationship with her grandchildren, describing her as an “amazing granny” who is hands-on and genuinely interested in what they are doing.

Camilla is reportedly helping Harry and Charles rebuild their relationship

With Harry and Meghan preparing for their return to Britain, royal sources have told the Mirror that Camilla has been an important factor in the improving relationship between Harry and Charles.

According to insiders, Camilla has helped Charles soften his position towards the Sussexes, particularly because of his desire to maintain a relationship with his grandchildren.

Sources have also claimed that Camilla encouraged the King not to shut Harry out after the Duke was diagnosed with cancer in 2024.

Her intervention is said to have helped create a path towards reconciliation between father and son after years of strained relations.

The transformation in Harry and Camilla’s relationship is therefore striking. The woman he once publicly attacked in his memoir is now believed to have played a role behind the scenes in helping him reconnect with his father and, ultimately, with the wider Royal Family.

As the Sussexes prepare to spend an extended period in the UK, that complicated relationship will now enter another chapter — one shaped less by Harry’s past accusations and more by the possibility of rebuilding family ties.